Buying a home and moving can be stressful. And it can be even more challenging if you have children who may be fearful or unsure about the big move! Of course, the way that you discuss moving with your children will depend greatly on their age, and whether or not they’re in school and potentially even switching schools.
Most kids, especially younger ones, will really follow your lead in terms of their attitude and excitement towards the move. If a parent or family member expresses overt frustration or reluctance about the move, (perhaps for an unfortunate job change, a financial reason, or the result of a divorce) kids will pick up on this, and are more likely to struggle with the change as well.
Instead, modeling enthusiasm and explaining the need for the move and the benefits that the new home will provide will be helpful for most kids. That said, it’s important to remember that many children are very attached to their home – especially if it’s the only home they’ve ever known. Being sensitive towards this attachment is important, and some kids benefit from creating a scrapbook of memories from the home, or even having a little “goodbye” party or ritual.
One of the most important things, especially for children under the age of 5 or 6, is to explain exactly what will be coming with, and what won’t be coming with. The youngest children may be fearful that certain beloved items, such as a pet or a favorite toy, won’t be making the big trip with them.
For older children, the stress of moving tends to depend greatly on whether or not they’ll be switching schools, and whether or not the home the old home was in a neighborhood where they had friends.
It tends to be really helpful to give your older kids a little sense of control during the move process – for example, you may ask them for their opinion while you’re touring potential new homes, and then offer to let them pick out the paint color or entirely design their new bedroom when you settle on your new home. Additionally, be sure to keep older children in the loop about the moving process. Let them know about these new potential neighborhoods, and offer to tour them prior to the move and check out the local movie theater, parks, and other places where they may hang out.
If you are planning on switching schools or making a more significant move, be sure to watch our video on Switching Schools with Kids in our Video Library.
Plus, you may have seen that EveryHome co-owner and co-founder Katie Kennedy has written and published a wonderful children’s book about moving. Be sure to pick up a copy of Bob The Box to help your little ones better understand what it’ll be like to move to a new home.